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QuirkyWords I HAVE THE SECRET SAUCE (ID: 1412392)
WARNING:Exciting Writer (*NOT* BORING). Read at your own risk! :)
Samples:
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Writing, Editing & Translation
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Earnings (Year):
$0
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Summary
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| Member Since: |
June 25, 2011 | 0 quotes in last 30 days
| Last Signed in: March 28, 2012
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| Location: |
Austin, Texas | United States |
| Would work on site: |
No |
| Earnings (All Time): |
$0 |
Earnings by Skill (Year): |
| Writing, Editing & Translation |
$0 |
| Articles & Press Releases |
$0 |
| Blogs |
$0 |
| Copywriting |
$0 |
| Creative Writing |
$0 |
| Web Content |
$0 |
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Feedback |
| Rate: |
Min. Rate: N/A | Min. Budget: $0.00 |
Work Terms |
| Industries: |
Clothing & Textile, Consumer Products, Consumer Services, Food & Beverage, Performing & Fine Arts |
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Highlights
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WARNING: THIS WRITER IS NOT A SNOOZEFEST. Viewer discretion is advised.
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Do you want to hypnotize readers with WORDS MORE PERFECT THAN RAINBOWS & NEWBORN CHILDREN?
Do you want to make people laugh until they SHOOT MILK OUT OF THEIR NOSE *AND* PEE A LITTLE? (at the same time?!?!)
Do you want to have people LOOK, LISTEN, AND FORK OVER THEIR INHERITANCE?
Then hire the one, the only, QUIRKY WORDS.
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I can wordsmith the heck out of anything you desire. I can make:
-Your ideal Witty Dating Profile / Witty Wedding Speech / Witty Divorce Announcement
-Your educational piece, packing knowledge into heads like
cranberry stuffing crammed into a turkey...mmmm, delicious golden-baked knowledge.
-Your meme-heavy blog post, so cutting edge I accidentally cut myself while writing & wear Band-Aids on every finger. THE SCOOBY-DOO KIND OF BAND-AIDS. (Because I am hardcore. )
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I will not make:
Anything boring. Unless you really want me to. Here, let's try listing boring things: A pair of socks. Taxes. Global turnkey solutions.
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In closing...
From screenplays to blog posts... from sonnets to press releases...I will destroy any competition! Let's rule the world together. Contact me. ^_^
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Skills
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| Years of Experience: |
15 year(s) |
| Highest degree: |
Bachelor's Degree |
| Software Skills: |
Microsoft: Word, Excel, Powerpoint
Adobe: Photoshop, Illustrator, Premiere
Online: Wordpress, Typepad, Drupal, Blogger, Livejournal
Web: CSS, HTML, SEO. |
| Additional Skills: |
Fun, Funny, Comedy, Humor, Animation, Cartoon, Keyword Stuffing (j/k) ^_^ |
| Tested Skills: |
 |
| The Freelancer has not taken any Skill Tests. |
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Work Terms
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No information provided
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<
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Quirky writer, at your service.
We use only the best brainstorming techniques.
Quirky dogs have opinions, too. Very serious ones.
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My Account URL
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Contact this Freelancer Now!
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Instant Messenger
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Global Region
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| Country: |
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United States |
| GMT: |
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(GMT+09:30) Darwin |
| Local Time: |
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4:28 AM |
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| Profile |
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